Flawless

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“I woke up like this

We flawless, ladies tell ‘em

Say I, look so good tonight

God damn”

–  Beyoncé Knowles

Remember when I said in Pretty Hurts that I couldn’t remember what it was like to not have acne? 

Well my memory is still pretty terrible, because now I can’t remember what it’s like to not have flawless skin. 

I really and truly can’t. 

I look at my ‘before’ pictures from the Skin Health Institute and I’m flawed. 

In the literal and figurative sense. 

Flawed, because that’s how I saw myself with the abundant amount of pimples all over my face (and neck). 

Flawed because my brain is utterly amazed at the fact that my skin was like that a mere three months ago.

Flawed, because that’s how I felt.  Continue reading

Pretty Hurts

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“Shine the light on whatever’s worse

Perfection is the disease of a nation

Pretty hurts”

–  Beyoncé

It’s been almost a year. 

A year of what exactly?

A year of my skin progressively getting worse, and worse over time. 

For some a year is a pretty long time

For other’s it’s short. 

For me? 

It felt like during that time, I couldn’t remember anything from the past. 

Like the times when I wore no make-up to work. 

When I didn’t feel as if the first thing noticed by strangers was my skin.

When I felt comfortable and confident just having the occasional two spots on my skin. 

When I wasn’t paranoid thinking that when people looked at me, all they saw was an insecure acne riddled girl. 

To me, within the space of 365 days, I’d forgotten everything. 

Pretty terrible I know. 

And with my acne, like all things, it started off small. 

Two bumps on my cheek. 

Which I popped, like I’ve done so many times before. 

Then something different happened. 

The two bumps came back, bigger this time, AND they brought two other friends with them. 

So again, I thought, no big deal.

Been here.

Done this. 

Popped them again. 

But like a bad ex, they kept coming back.  Continue reading

Supermodel

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I don’t see myself

Why I can’t stay alone just by myself

Wish I was comfortable just with myself

 SZA

Skin.

The largest organ in the human body.

Fun Fact: skin can form additional thickness and toughness — a callus — when exposed to repeated friction or pressure.

I guess this is where the saying, “ That the more you go through, the thicker your skin’.

Skin is unique to everyone; the colour, the undertones, the freckles, the texture, the acne and the degree to which we feel comfortable in it.

Lately, I’ve gotta level with you; my skin is the very last thing I feel comfortable in.  Continue reading